Dwell on What’s Going Well

Sometimes it’s difficult to see the bright side.  If you have experienced loss in any form whether it’s divorce, to becoming an empty nester, losing a loved one, or watching someone drift away slowly with something like dementia, it’s easy to get depressed. Instead of dwelling on what you are missing or wishing things were different, change your mindset to dwell on what’s going well. Studies have shown that gratitude can increase your happiness by 10 percent and reduce depression by 35 percent.

Here are a few ways to add gratitude into your life:

1. Put It in Writing

There’s something powerful about putting your thoughts on paper. I recommend using a gratitude journal.  Take some time every day to write down at least 3 things you are grateful for,

Start small.  Don’t aim for perfection—just put your thoughts down.  I journal in the morning to start my day on a positive note.

2. Turn Grief into Gratitude

Look around your home—whether it’s photos, artwork, crafts, or souvenirs that remind you of your lost loved ones. They are all around you.  You are almost getting a visual hug and a visual reminder of how many reasons you have to be grateful for a lifetime of memories, lessons learned, and the love you shared.

3. Create Your Top 10 List

If you want to boost your mood, try this exercise:

• Think about something or someone you love:  It could be your favorite food or drink, someone you love or admire/ or someone you miss

• Now list your reasons

• Or have fun and list out your Top Ten Favorite Things

Now that you are starting to practice gratitude, make it an intentional part of your day.  Start noticing what you’re thankful for during the day and make a note of it - either write it down, add a note on your phone or computer, or do my favorite thing and send yourself an email.  

Gratitude is a mindset, but it's also a practice. Each time you pause to notice what’s going well in your life—no matter how small it seems—you’re noticing what is going well in the moment. I believe that happiness is a choice.  Frank Sinatra understood this concept when he sang “Smile and the world smiles with you.” 

Your challenge this week:  Be the first person to smile when you see someone and watch what happens.