Self Care is Essential
As a Mindset and Motivational Coach, I help women prioritize their self-care. I learned the importance of self-care the hard way a few years ago when I was feeling depressed, exhausted, and discouraged. I wasn’t taking care of myself well, and I was using food and alcohol as a crutch to comfort and numb my feelings because of what I was going through. It was one of the most difficult times in my life – two of my best friends were failing at the same time: my mom, who was diagnosed with dementia, and a close friend, who was dying from pancreatic cancer.
The problem was I didn’t know how to get out of my own way. I was unable to do hard things because making changes felt vulnerable, and I didn’t have the strength to get better. I knew my habits were holding me back but I couldn’t move forward. It was a vicious cycle.
I was visiting my mother regularly and that was taking a lot out of me but when my friend invited me to see her, I knew I wanted to make that happen. It was kind of surreal because as I was driving to her beautifully decorated house in Cambridge, Massachusetts, I was remembering how we had celebrated her storybook wedding just a few years earlier. It was the kind of wedding that was in an Italian villa in Tuscany, with a seven-course meal, dancing under the moonlight… I mean it was amazing!
I never could have imagined that I would be sitting in her living room 7 years later to see her for the last time. I was so touched that she visited with me when she was so sick. I felt her pain when she winced and readjusted the tube in her side. She gave me the most wonderful gift. We reminisced about some of our happiest and most remarkable times together…20 years of friendship. When she died, it became very clear to me that life was precious. And it was crystal clear when my mother passed 2 and a half years later.
January 1st, 2022. I made a big mindset shift. I had gone out the night before on New Year’s Eve and drank WAY too much. That was the final straw for me. I decided to commit to change. I was no longer going to use alcohol as a crutch. I was ready for real and lasting change. I read every book and followed every influencer who espoused positivity. It was time to get out of my depression. When I began a gratitude practice that year I could feel my depression lift. I became excited and curious about my life. I spoke to a friend about her coaching career and then I signed up for not one, but two courses that were running at the same time. I took an amazing self-development course and an empowering coaching certification for women and the synergy helped me change my life.
I began doing the work, improving my habits, getting into shape, and I began a morning routine to set me up for the day. I had learned the importance of prioritizing my self and my self-care. Fast forward to the end of that year and I was feeling euphoric! I was thinking: “I can’t believe it. Everything is aligned. I’m pursuing my dreams!”
Although I had been coaching friends and family for decades, I went all-in and became a Certified Coaching Specialist to help other women go through health, mindset, and any other challenges that came their way. I was clear about my purpose and how to help other people without losing myself in the process.
I know so many people today are taking care of their parents, their spouses, their children, and other family members and it is easy to set your needs aside. But I can tell you from experience that it is your responsibility to take some time just for yourself or it will lead to burnout. You can shift your thinking to prioritize yourself so you can finally do the things you’ve wanted to do for years and get more out of life. Don’t be like me and wait 20 years before you pursue your passion. You can prioritize yourself while you take care of others without feeling guilty.
